India’s military has a crowd control grenade that’s packed with seeds from the world’s hottest chili pepper. It scatters people faster than an I.R.S. agent at a Tea Party convention.
SeaWorld's whale that killed an employee last month has a new customized toothbrush. It was due for a new one; dentists suggest replacing it after 2 or 3 trainers.
A company in Phoenix has created a talking headstone. You record a message so people can hear your voice from the grave; it’s how CNN does Larry King’s show.
A California restaurant accused of selling whale meat is closing. Nobody believed the chef's claim that it was a whale substitute called I can’t Believe it’s Not Blubber.
An exorcist said the devil is at work in the Vatican. Wow. Those E.O.E. laws are really getting strict.
Nomar Garciaparra inked a 1-day contract with Boston so he could retire as a member of the Red Sox. Out of habit they put him on the disabled list.
Rapper Lil’ Wayne was sentenced to one year in prison. English teachers say it’ll be the first sentence he’s completed in years.
Two days after Barack Obama’s doctor cautioned him about his cholesterol the President was seen eating fried chicken. It should remove any doubt Obama is an American.
Starbucks instituted a policy that allows guns in their stores, so please be clear when you tell the barista you want an espresso shot.
Last week Dr. Seuss fans marked the 106th anniversary of his birth. Nobody was better at making up funny-sounding words, except maybe George W. Bush.
Doctors want standard colon screenings to explore deeper into the colon. That explains all the new people being hired by the I.R.S.
GM's deal to sell the Hummer brand to China fell apart, which likely means the deal was made in China.
Seaworld’s killer whale was involved with 2 deaths before the one two weeks ago, yet they didn’t set it free. At least somebody learned a lesson from the O.J. trial.
A California man was hit by a train twice within 2 weeks. And yet he’s still had a better month than the president of Toyota.
Marijuana use is up among senior citizens. And so is the average time of their bingo games.
A woman in Sweden allegedly taped pictures of her ex-boyfriend's private parts on light posts around town. Neighbors thought a politician was missing.
Toyota placed ads in U.S. newspapers with an open letter from their president. He mentioned how successful Toyota is; nothing else works but at least their horn still toots.
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