- Doctors say a blood thinner will be used to dissolve the clot in Dick Cheney’s leg. I thought salt was the best way to dissolve ice.
- A 91-year-old Florida man is challenging 92-year-old fitness guru Jack LaLanne to a boxing match. Plans are underway for a movie about the match, “Aging Bull.”
- Another model says she’s carrying the child of Patriots quarterback Tom Brady, the second woman in a month to make the claim. The announcement forced the quarterback to scramble as he’s now looking at double coverage.
- Because he worked with Anna Nicole Smith in a 1994 movie, O.J. Simpson claims he could be Dannielynn’s father since he has slow-moving sperm. Don’t laugh. The mother of his other children is dead too.
- A Salt Lake City man tried to run over his wife with a car one day after their wedding. Police report that the back window said, “Just Buried!”
- After a fender bender, a Florida woman ran over the other motorist trying to exchange insurance information and drove with her on the hood for over a mile. Bail was set at $10,000, later posted by a Salt Lake City man who had been married less than one day.
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