- A Nebraska college basketball coach was back on the bench for a game just 5 hours after she had a baby at the hospital. It’s a boy—at least that’s what she thinks the doctor yelled across the parking lot.
- The U.N. Security Council agreed in principle on stronger sanctions against Iran for enriching uranium. The bold new sanctions include the sentence, “Hey, cut it out. We really mean it this time. Please don’t hurt us.”
- Chinese officials say they will crack down on public spitting when the 2008 Olympics are in Beijing. Consequently, Tonya Harding won’t be attending.
- Wal-Mart is dropping its bid to establish a bank. Apparently they couldn’t find a source to provide toasters to new customers.
- Surgeons completed the first spinal transplant in China. Americans are excited because politicians will have the chance to get a spine.
- Seven members of the British Royal Navy were sickened by a toxic gas when someone cleaning a toilet area mixed ammonia and bleach. The case is being investigated by a special cleansing agent.
- A German belly dancer was awarded $24,000 compensation after a plastic surgeon accidentally sucked away one of her buttocks. In a show of kindness, thousands of American women volunteered to donate theirs.
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