- Astronaut Lisa Nowak’s story is already being made into a movie. Her family will play the role of the diapers.
- A Michigan woman lost her $5,000 wedding ring when her pit bull ate it. Sad, since it was still on her finger.
- New York City Catholic leaders declared a holy war against the city's distribution of 26 million free condoms. Upon hearing of this, Democrats immediately passed a non-binding anti-war resolution.
- A new study reveals that your office desk harbors far more bacteria than your workplace restroom. The big difference? Paperwork.
- A dog owner is accusing a groomer of cutting off her dog’s ear and trying to glue it back on. Thus ends the grooming career of Mike Tyson.
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