A Different Animal

I come from a family that has hunting in its DNA. But I don’t like to hunt. Fortunately, my dad and brothers don’t hunt black sheep. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy taking a life as much as the next guy. And I hunted while growing up. I love the outdoors and I support the Second Ammendment.

But it’s no accident I was born during the evolution of the microwave. I think God put me on earth at this time for a reason. He knew I would starve if I had to kill my own food. I would have been a lousy caveman because I’m not good with clubs. Well, not counting the time I conquered a beastly sparrow on the 13th hole. Sheldon Brock can talk on the subject of my spear throwing ability. The scar on his shoulder shows how bad I missed the target with a lawn dart in the third grade.

But I’ll hunt again because my son loves it. I just have to master the craft of bringing down a bull elk with stinging sarcasm.